Watch Out There is a Thief About

This time of year is when plants get harvested, but unfortunately not always by the plot holder.

It is frustrating for those who have been nurturing and watering their crop and expecting to reap the reward, only to turn up to find the bush has been stripped of fruit, the veg dug up and the tomatoes gone. Well it’s never as devastating as that.

‘I just want to tell you someone has stripped all the plums of one of my trees’ reads the email.

You sympathise, but wonder what on earth you are supposed to do? Can you imagine their response if you said, ‘Tell you what, why don’t you and I camp out in your shed and try and catch them? You bring the thermos and I’ll bring the biscuits. After all, there is nothing on the box tonight, is there?’

After a few lame excuses about prior engagements or the mother in law visiting that night it soon becomes clear that the fruit has already gone, along with the will to help catch the thief.

There is little anyone can do about stolen produce and the value of the goods is not monetary but about the produce and effort lost.

It’s strange that often the same plots suffer and even the same bushes. Repeat offenders repeat on the same plants every year, and clearly are creatures of habit. We have even had the whole bush lifted and yes, no one saw a thing.

‘Maybe it is the rats,’ I suggest to Lottie.

‘But we don’t have any on the site as the Freddie Fox rules the plots at night,’ she responds.

‘Maybe it’s the squirrels who are very adept at climbing even the tallest sunflower to chew off its head.’

‘Give over, they are very selective in what they eat and not that good at digging up whole potato plants and they also know I could be lying around waiting to chase them,’ says Lottie.

I suggest ‘Maybe it’ss that squadron of wood pigeons who raid the broccoli and anything not netted, or their cousins the crows and magpies?’

Lottie rolls her big whippet eyes, ‘They do like any ripe fruit but often leave it half eaten and you would see a trail of large deposits of similarly coloured poo.’

Lottie adds before I can say more, ‘It’s certainly not Freddie and his foxes who may poo, play and dig everywhere, but aren’t veggies at heart.’

So that leaves other plot holders whose harvest may not be up to scratch or in need of a supplement. But the damage is often overnight and when plot holders should be tucking into their food not stealing it from others.

There are the outsiders who, on seeing free food, could clamber over two metre steel fences and barbed wire. Surely, they would clear all the plots and not selectively pick on one lonely but overloaded tree. You would think that they would have a shopping bag and take as much as possible, after all it’s like a bank robber turning over a bank and only taking a tenner and leaving the rest behind.

‘Of course, it could be a gang of wild youths,’ I suggest to Lottie, thinking back to my long lost youth and pinching apples from neighbour’s gardens.

‘Yes,’ Lottie says with a broad grin. ‘I can see them looking at yellow courgettes and patti pans  wondering what to do with them. After all they don’t get them with a Big Mac do they.’

Having watched Naturewatch and those fascinating night cameras, some believe CCTV cameras are the solution and that the grainy picture will capture the culprit infra-red handed. But to place cameras on every plot and to cover every angle would be a worse infringement of privacy than our High Streets today and it’s only an allotment and a bit of produce.

‘So what’s the answer?’ I ask Lottie.

‘There is no answer’ she responds. ‘And if you think you can get me to camp out in the shed every night and all night you can think again. It’s too cold and I need my bed and I guarantee the night I have off, the phantom thief of the plots will strike and the next day the complaints will fly and fingers will be pointed at me.’

Some say that locks on sheds invite thieves. When my daughter and her site were experiencing lots of shed thefts she removed her lock off her shed. Surprisingly she didn't have any more unwanted visitors, perhaps they already knew what she had and moved on to pastures new, but they went elsewhere.

Personally i have marketed all my tools with a permanent marker to state my ownership. Obviously there are many options here and some tools aren't worth marking whilst some are difficult to do bur I would suggest its a deterrent to many an opportunist. 

Personally, if someone is desperate enough to steal my produce, as long as they leave me some, so be it. If it is a plot holder and they get caught they will lose their plot. If it’s an animal, action may be taken to protect stuff in the future. If it’s outsiders, then again action to protect plots needs to be taken.

Also you can't mark your plants and produce.

But it’s not the end of the world, and there’s always next season.