How Big is your Shed?

As allotments increasingly engage the whole family and become more a social activity, then the demand for the perceived associated accessories grows.

‘We need a deck area. I’ve seen a great one at B&Q’ says one half of the plot.

‘I can’t grow stuff through a wooden floor’, replies the other half.

‘Who’s talking about growing stuff? I need somewhere to relax with my glass of wine.’

‘Glass of wine! You’ll be wanting loungers and a parasol and an artificial grass deck next.’

‘That’s a point. B&Q has some nice furniture on offer today and I saw one of those Mexican outdoor oven thingies. We could have a BBQ at the end of the day.’

‘Next you’ll be wanting a new shed.’

‘Well that thing is a disgrace. Have you seen the one opposite? Now that’s what I call a shed.’

They both look towards what best could be described as a shed with a conservatory extension, double gazing, sun loungers, big brick BBQ with chimney and a building fit for any gentrified suburban back garden.

Today the gulf of expectation between some old and new, affluent and not so affluent plot holders can be wide. Is this wrong, or right? Once a shed standard is set, is it set for ever, or open to change?

Historically the shed was often six by four and for keeping tools, seeds and other stuff in. It then started to get bigger, but its purpose remained largely the same. There was a space to sit out on but not a large area.

We went on Mediterranean holidays and saw vine covered balconies and verandas. We became more al fresco in our living, the outdoor indoor house become the conversion grail. No TV makeover was complete without the eating area, sitting space and loggia. These obviously had an influence on some plot holder’s expectations.

The cultural and ethnic mix within the sites also was changing and as they became more inclusive and diverse the family al fresco style increased. 

I remember being invited onto my then CEO’s new boat in Cowes. It was impressive and obviously he had a huge bonus that year and was taking the nautical life seriously. I looked at the cabin of this ‘gin palace’ and he caught me looking at the hanging plant baskets, the painting on the cabin wall and the ultra-modern furniture.

‘That’s all going tomorrow,’ he said double guessing my thoughts. ‘She did it when I wasn’t looking.’

‘I was only thinking how it would fair in the English Channel’,  I replied taking another sip of my G&T.

Having experienced some excessive ‘extensions’ and patio creep we have reiterated within our rules the shed and associated standards. We have been told one thing was being built, only to find something completely different and twice the size went up. We have now introduced a planning permission process whereby all ‘erections’ have to be submitted to the Site Manager and approved by Committee first. It’s not a case of being over bureaucratic, it’s a case of being fair to all and exercising some control. When some leave, the plot is reviewed and some existing ‘sheds’ maybe will have to come down.

The days of build first ask later no longer exist here.

The pictures were by kind permission of  B Bulcock and J Smith respectively.